Pre: View - Dante's The Divine Comedy (1320) COMIC TEASER SPECIAL

3/10. Mid in the worst way - one for the dustbin. Trash and Outdated as Hell (not literally) - why don't these losers talk like actual people? It's all thou this, and thy that - just cut the bloody piss-arsin' about, mate!

Also, it's like, crazy inaccurate, innit. Like, he thinks Hell woulda always been like that from when they first got started. How do you fink they stay in business, then, you mong? By changing with the times.

It was early days when that guy was down there probably, so all those stupid celebs he was namedroppin and argie bargie, lordin it up with ain't gonna be relevant for long. If you think that anyone is gonna give a toss about Virgil the Virgin licherally 2 years after you wrote about 'im, you're shchoopid, mate. Also, does the bloke think everyone is a Catholic or summin? Where d' he get his sauces from? Bet 'e 'ain't even been down 'ere 'imself neither. Satan frozen in ice with three 'eads? Fuck u on about mate?

Anyways, ye, 2/10, kinda shit tbh. - Brian.

Gustave Doré was a fucking perv - no need for everyone in Hell to be naked and absolutey ripped.

¿Tell me, amigo, what remains to be discussed concerning a poem which has distilled Western culture and injects it into the veins of its readers so eloquently? It's seed is present in all those mediocre ephemera of today which so honour it through their flaccid flattery, eternal pertinence seeping through Dante's verse and spilling forth from the page. ¡The answer to the above question is, NADA! I disdain quantifying the monolithic sublime with a petty score, so just remember what I tell you next.

If you value your cultivation, mano à mano, I beseech thee to consume this text with thirst of Christ himself after cuarenta dias y cuarenta noches in the Judean Desert. Simplemente, el mejor. - Ignacio.

Uhhhh.....It was alright I.....guess? Aw heck, Ah don't know, I'm sure there's somn' behind it, but gosh darn it, Ah just can't for the life o' me see hwat it eeyuz. That there Dante sure seemed like a...uh...cool guy, though. A real Eyetalian Stallion, hehe. You bet your bottom dollar I'm gon' sit my ass down and see if I can't crack this mother hubbard. Catcha later. I'll, uhh...get back to ya. - Dale.

Ass. - Abdul.

The four main characters of our epic journey into the underworld give their take on the classic that preceded them. The script for the first issue of "Bloody Hell Mate" is coming soon.